Since I was laid of 8 months ago, I have been taking care of a sick relative who has just started dialysis.  They pay me cash each week and I was wondering if a can list this on my resume to cover the gap in employment?  I have only had three interviews and have used this as a reason why I have been unemployed so long.

I understand your situation.  My father died of kidney failure in November and needed to take car of my mother.  You will need to put down that others can take over if you get a job.  With dialysis it is usually 3 days of week, usually on the weekdays.  Here is what I just came up with.  Put this before your last job.  Modify for your own purpose.  You just don't want to mention your own medical problems, but for another person that is different..



CAREGIVER, 7/2012-2/2013.  Main Caregiver to my parents, after retired brother’s death in July, father past away in November.  Mother is now mainly being taken care of by retired sister.   

 

Father --passed-- away. /sorry for your loss// But I didn't want op to use as a direct quote with the wrong homonym.

I agree it can be used, even if op wasn't paid. Its a significant chunk of time with heavy responsibility. But I think the cover letter is a good place to explain that duties will be taken over, when one explains employment gap. Though some will wonder why other hasn't been doing it all along.

Thank you for the correction and recognizing loss.. 

The problem cover letters are rarely used and resumes are just posted..  With my Mom who has ALZHEIMER it is more then a 24 hour day.  Assisted Living is well over $125 a day for doing next to nothing..  Don't mention Nursing Homes.  For a long time medical condition like this it can it can take many years before dying. 

My sister and I both had her in Hospital, Nursing Home and Assisted Living until January.  We had to do this in November, that way she could visit my dying Dad..  All she wanted was to go home, which all older people do and misses my Dad and brother..  For her it was wrong to be in anywhere else but home for now.

My father was able to take care of Mom, somewhat.  With my brother dying of a sudden heat attack in July, made things worse.  Then my father had sudden kidney failure and passed away in three weeks in November.  My sister moved into my parents house taking care of her 24/7.

I rethought and came up with this instead.

CAREGIVER  Duties To Parents , 7/2012-2/2013.  Father passed away in November.  Mother diagnosed with Alzheimer is now being taken care of by sister who is a retired nurse from Missouri.

 

Hi initforme,

I'm very sorry to hear about your sick relative and you are very wonderful to have stepped forward to provide care.

Technically, this cash job isn't verifiable, but I do like the idea of including it on your resume to cover the "gap." DisabilityBuster is right -- cover letters aren't always submitted and even when they are, they don't always get read. But as Authorjln suggested, also mention it in your cover letter. Avoid TMI (too much info) though -- keep the explanation simple and focus on your strong interest in returning to your career.

You might want to explain the compensation as a stipend or something similar when you get to the background check stage.

I wrote a blog post years ago on this, but the strategy should still work -- it's similar to DisabilityBuster's approach:
Caregivers: How to Handle a Gap On Your Resume

Good luck to you!

Great Blog,  I was not just recently put in this position and was not sure of the approach.  In my situation when a person who has Alzheimer it can take years before passing away.  Since, my mother was diagnosed in 2008, things did get progressively worse.  I rewrote this, maybe others want to modify it, if they have a similar situation.  Many older children are having to take care of their parents, sometimes miles away from their home for long periods of times.  Nursing Homes and Assisted Living are very expensive and should only be used as a last resort.  Employers sometimes can be understanding, if not you don't need to work for them!


Caregiver, City, State 2008 –2/2013.  Still worked Contract Assignments.  Mother diagnosed with Alzheimer in 2008.  Father passed away in November.  Sister, Retired Nurse from Missouri, is now taking care of Mother full time.  Continue to update skills during and between assignments.

Hi DisabilityBuster,

Thanks -- I'm glad it was helpful. I'm very sorry for your loss. I like how you revised the section, but I'm wondering why you are mentioning your caregiver role if you were handling consulting assignments during this time. Unless the assignments were few and far between, you can remove the caregiver section and replace with your contract assignments.

If the contract work was infrequent and you decide to keep the caregiver section, I would edit it so you don't provide quite as many details. I wouldn't mention your father passing away or the details of your sister taking over. Maybe something short and sweet, like this:

Caregiver, 2008-2/2013: Concurrent with handling contract assignments in ___ field, provided care for parent suffering with Alzheimer's disease. Continued to update ___ skills throughout this time period.

Can we talk about the assisted living 'doing next to nothing'? I realize it is off-topic, but without tmi, let'sjust say I have an interest in learning more about what this, your experiences were like. Further, as in-home care, have you or yur sister had to hire asnyone else, like an elder companion, if neither of you were available?

   

My opinion of Assisted Living and Nursing Homes should only been used as the means of last resort.  My father did the best job he could for my mother.  However, he babied her too much.  When he died in November, this caused additional problems for her.and us.  She was not ready for staying in Hospital, Nursing Home and Assisted Living.  Her home is all she knew and was comfortable with.  We had no other real support.  I live 60 miles away and my sister lives in another state, one thousand miles away.  My older brother's daughter lives close by. Although she has helped tremendously, she does have a life to live.

For what you paid, it would have been cheaper to stay at someone's house.  The staff at any of these facilities rarely come around and if call takes forever to respond.  If anyone is considering to use these places for temporary so called babysitting, forget it! 

She now is back at her home, where she is less confused and enjoying life again.  My father should of hired someone for even himself to get away for a few hours.  Nobody should do it alone or count on family or friends entirely.  They are not there when you need them.  I need to discuss this with my sister to find others who we can trust..  I  support my mother and sister as much as I could.. We all have limitations.  There is no place like home, has special meaning for older people.  It is the place they know best!